'Tis the Season: NoHo Noir, Chapter 8

In this week's episode a wannabe screenwriter whose former partner has been wildly successful attends a Christmas party at his old friend's house. He leaves feeling very unfestive.
As always, Mark Satchwill has contributed a terrific illustration.

Here's a short excerpt from the story:

Christopher "Christo" Garland had gotten lost on the way to Eric and Celia's house. He had Mapquested it but he'd ended up in the wrong lane at that crazy intersection near the Iliad Bookshop and somehow he'd ended up on Burbank Boulevard going east. When he passed Circus Liquor, it reminded him that he hadn't bought a gift, so he parked and ran in to see what was cheap.

Circus Liquor
5600 Vineland Avenue
North Hollywood, CA 91601
8:15 p.m.

He grabbed a black bottle of Freixinet and brought it to the counter. He swiped his credit card as casually as possible, mentally crossing his fingers the transaction would go through. It didn't.

He tried again as the clerk eyed him sympathetically. When the verification failed a second time, Christo made a show of examining the card. "Expired last month," he said. "I forgot to put the new one in my wallet."

The clerk, who knew all about expired credit cards, just nodded as Christo pulled the last bill from his wallet, a twenty.

And just to show the clerk he didn't need his pity; Christo stuffed the change into one of the charity jars set up by the cash register. He probably makes what? Minimum wage? And he feels sorry for me?

By the time Christo finally arrived at his destination, there didn't seem to be a vacant parking space left in all of Toluca Lake. In front of Eric and Celia's house, there were uniformed valets hiking cars back and forth.

Eric and Celia hired valets for their party? I wonder how much that cost?

Read the rest of the story here.

New NoHo Noir--Cosmos

The story continues over at NoHo Noir with this flash fiction about a father and a son contemplating the mysteries of life. You'll see these characters again when the father is accused of murdering his ex-wife's new boyfriend. (The title of the series is NoHo NOIR after all.) The illustration by Mark Satchwill features my favorite building in the world, L.A.'s Griffith Observatory.

Here's an excerpt: The L.A. Observatory was Ty Garrett’s favorite place in the world so when the boy asked him to take him there, James was happy to oblige. Ty had been moody and restless all weekend, unwilling to open up about what was bothering him. James hoped a little star-gazing would make Ty feel better.

James hated that he didn’t know what was going on with his son all the time. He was 11 now, more little man than little boy, and it seemed like every time he saw him, Ty had changed in some subtle way. At least Erika had been good about the custody thing. But still, he hated her for breaking up the family, hated her for leaving him for the whitest man in Encino, a dentist who had billboards in three languages polluting the landscape all over the Valley.

It wasn’t the money. James was a good provider. He had parlayed a stint working in an Army motor pool into a business servicing temperamental foreign cars and their equally temperamental owners, people who pronounced “Jaguar” as three syllables like they’d been born in London, England and not London, Kentucky. In a good year, James pulled down six figures. Erika had no cause to complain there.

“Tooth guy wants me to call him ‘Uncle Tim’,” Ty blurted out, as if in answer to his father’s thoughts. Erika didn’t like it when Ty called Tim that and asked James not to encourage the disrespect. Most of the time he respected her wishes but now didn’t seem to be the moment for a lecture.

James glanced at his son’s anxious face. “Must be getting serious with your mother,” he replied neutrally.

Ty nodded. “We’re going to move in with him at Christmas,” he said.

READ the rest of the story here.

Dearly Departed at NoHo Noir

There's a new installment of NoHo Noir up at patch.com. The "Noir" is subtle on this one but it's there. I'm still introducing characters but along about Christmas, you'll see some story arcs beginning to emerge. (My initial contract is just for three months, and that'll be up early in the new year, so just in case I don't get "renewed," I do want to tie off some of the story threads.)

As you can see, the story is illustrated by another great piece of art by Mark Satchwill. You can see more of his art on his site, but also in the upcoming Dark Valentine Magazine winter issue. The winter issue of Dark Valentine will be available Friday, December 3.

One of the things about the stories appearing on patch.com is that I'm visiting the site several times a day and they publish hyper-local crime news. I never knew my little corner of the world was so ... crime-infested. Ignorance is bliss, I guess.

I hope you like the story. If you do, please click on "recommend." Or leave a comment. My editors love comments and so do I. Thanks for your support.

New at NoHo Noir--15 Items or Less

This week at NoHo Noir, a trophy wife and an unimpressed supermarket checker go mano a mano in the express line. There's a bit at the end, where the trophy wife--who's wearing a quarter-million dollar watch--tries to use an expired coupon. That was inspired by a story I once heard about Bill Gates holding up a line because he had a five-cent off coupon for some ice cream. I don't know if it's true--it's so deliciously snarky--but it makes for a great story.

If you're following the series you'll note the tattooed guy in line behind the trophy wife is Chris from "House Blend" who ended up with the wrong Jessica on his coffee date. We'll see him again. We'll also see the wife and the checker again.

I hope you enjoy 15 Items or Less.

New NoHo Noir Story: Wrong Turn

With the Halloween story "Wrong Turn," my print-based web series NoHo Noir really starts rolling on Patch.com's North Hollywood-Toluca Lake site. This series of interlocking tales will follow a diverse cast of people who live and work and drive through the cities of North Hollywood and Toluca Lake, California--two cities that could not be more different.

The series made its debut the same day as the website and the first story in the series, "House Blend" got a lot of buzz. ("House Blend" was the most popular story on the site from Sunday, when it was posted until late Friday night.)

The series is a collaboration between me and illustrator Mark Satchwill, who furnishes illustrations for each story and also created the creepy clown logo for the series. I'm really hoping to develop a following for NoHo Noir. The NoHo/Toluca Lake Patch site is the first to offer fiction and I am, frankly, having a ball.

Read the story here.

NoHo Noir--Tales of the City of North Hollywood

If you've ever driven through North Hollywood, California, chances are you've passed Circus Liquor. And if you've passed it, you've seen their creepy clown logo looming over the street. That image perfectly encapsulates the feel of a new series of weekly fiction I'll be writing for patch.com, a hyper-local news site based in North Hollywood and Toluca Lake.

I am really, really, really excited about this new writing gig. (I almost used exclamation points, which I almost never do. That's how excited I am.) Illustrator Mark Satchwill will be collaborating with me to create stories and visuals that are connected by characters, themes, locations and plot elements. Eventually the stories will stitch together in a patchwork quilt of a novel along the lines of Armistead Maupin's Tales of the City. We hope.

The first story isn't really noir but trust me, they'll get darker next week with the publication of "Wrong Turn" for Halloween. This is how we describe the series: NoHo Noir is fiction that’s not for the faint-hearted. Written by Katherine Tomlinson and illustrated by Mark Satchwill, these tales are weekly walks on the wild side, narratives torn from the bleeding heart of North Hollywood and Toluca Lake; stories of love and death and everything that lies between…

Please go by the site and check out "House Blend." I think you'll like it. Stories will post every Sunday and be up until Monday. They'll be archived.